Wish Denied

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I tried walking backwards

but IT was like a moving floor that forced me ahead.

I tried to dig my heels into the ground

but the ground was sand and IT was a big kite with a strong gust of wind pulling me along.

I tried to turn around

but IT was like a spell that wouldn't allow me to turn my head around to look back.

I tried to stand still

but IT was like an adult grabbing the hand of a stubborn child dragging them along against their will.

For a second...

One brief second there was silence.....

I was floating through my mind able to quiet my thoughts.

For one quick instance, I was exactly where I wanted to be. 

I wasn't any younger but...

for exactly one second I wasn't any older.

I'm terrified of what lies ahead. 

I'm not ready to grow up. 

What is a grown-up anyway?

How do I know if I am one?

I've never been one before.

You know what I have been before? 

A child

A tween

A teen

In my 20's 

Now in my 30's

I've been all these things, yet at every stage, I longed for more.

"I wish I was older"

Wish granted.

"I wish I could do whatever I want"

Wish granted.

"I wish I didn't have to do what they tell me to do"

Wish granted.

"I wish I could be an adult"

Wish granted.

But then.....

"I wish I was a kid again"

Wish denied.

"I wish I didn't have to do so much"

Wish denied.

"I wish I had someone to tell me what to do"

Wish denied.

"I wish.....I wish I didn't have to be an adult"

Wish...... 

denied.

They warned me, oh did they warn me and I didn't listen.

If only I had been careful what I wished for. 

I wish I could take it all back.......

but I couldn't my wish was denied. 







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