Mommy Meltdown

 The ABCs of a Mommy Meltdown is a poem I wrote years ago. Unfortunately, I cannot find the original, so I wrote a revised version. My original was all about the crazy life I was living at the time as a mom with two under two and three elementary-age children, starting my journey of becoming a SAHM. Up until that point, I had always worked. Since I was 13 years old, I had been doing some form of work, whether it was babysitting (I have a very large family; my grandmother on my mom’s side had 11 children) or, once I turned 16, getting an actual, no benefits included, paid job. Now, my “meltdown” is appearing in a different form. I am starting to have growing pains—the pains of watching my once sweet, cherub-faced babies grow up and become their own person, and it hurts. Don’t get me wrong. I am a proud momma. I love watching them grow and make choices on their own (whether good or bad; I’ll be there through all that I can). But it all seems to be happening so quickly that I al...

 Let’s talk…… How are you doing today? Okay……... Yeah……… Did you do anything exciting this week? …………. Did you have anyone to talk to about your week? If not, you can talk to me…. I’ll listen to you……. If you want, there’s a comment box at the bottom of this page. You can talk to me about anything, and I’ll listen. Sometimes you just need someone to talk to about the bad and good things. Knowing someone is taking the time to show you that you matter can be a big deal. So, I’m not writing a long post today or going into any stories about anything. I just want to lend an ear and listen to whatever it is you’ve been wanting to talk about but haven’t had the chance to find someone who will actually listen. I’m listening, you are being heard.     ***I also have an email account set up for the Mommy Meltdown blog. If you don’t want to leave a message in the comments and would feel more comfortable emailing please feel free to. You will still get a ...

Growing up I was always told to only rely on myself. No matter what don’t ever NEED anyone. Regardless, most of the people who were telling me this were either on marriage number 1-something, divorced, and/ or childless. Most of them were professionally happy though. I would hear these people I looked up to say things like, "I don't need no man/ woman to make me happy." or "I can be happy all by myself” or “I’m happy only relying on myself”. For a long time, I thought that was what I needed to be. A strong self-sufficient woman who didn't need anyone. Not just a man, in some cases not even children, just myself. Then......well….. I became a mom.  I had waited and waited for 9 months to finally have this tiny human. There she was in my arms looking up at me ready to face a scary big world.  That was the moment I knew that I DID need someone in my life. I couldn't be alone and be okay with that forever. I'm not saying that some people can’t do that, go for ...

 I took the best vacation ever! First off let's just talk about how well-needed this was. Now let's get into details...... I wanted to go somewhere warm but not too hot. I wasn't sure if I wanted to be by the water or something more inland. I decided on a little bit of both water and land.  I got myself a beautiful air B&B that was within walking distance to the water. I needed to make sure I kept my options open. It was not like I was going to go swimming or anything but maybe I'd want to just take a stroll by the water. All I wanted to do was find a nice cozy spot and read, maybe even write, and definitely relax. I just wanted time to myself, somewhat of a foreign concept to me. Somehow, I had it, no children, no crazy drama, just me, my thoughts, and a quiet spot for me to relax.  The place I was staying at had a beautiful garden area out back, quite big too. It was beautiful and there was a big tree towards the back of the yard with a lovely seat just under it. ...

 Today I just want to sit and talk to you. Maybe let you get to know me a little better and what is to come in this random blog of mine. Well first off, my name is Regina, for those of you who didn’t know lol, nice to meet you too. I have been married to my amazingly patient husband for 14+ years and we have been together since we were 16 years old. We have five “lovely” children ages (ready for this long list, that I sometimes forget. Oh, Lord just don’t ask me for birthday dates including years, we will be here for a little bit) 16 years, 15 years, 14 years, 10 (almost 11) years and 9 (almost 10 years) and yes, I did just count to make sure I had everyone. Four are our biological children and one of these wonderful children is my little sister’s son who I took in to help raise. My two youngest children are only 13 months apart (yes, 13 months. If you can do math *which sometimes in mommy brain mode I can’t* that would mean I became impregnated with my son 3 ½ months aft...

                                                             She sat quietly in her own thoughts She listened quietly to her own thoughts She observed quietly her own thoughts She sat and cried quietly listening to her own thoughts She never knew how lost she could get in her own thoughts She never knew how sad it could be to think her own thoughts She dreamt of faraway lands in her own thoughts She got lost in the dreams of her own thoughts  She soared to the beyond, high above in her own thoughts She sang a song of hope in her own thoughts She smiled at the life she imagined in her own thoughts She was sometimes scared of her own thoughts She never told anyone about her own thoughts She let fears take over her own thoughts She almost gave up the fight because of her own thoughts She found the hero ...